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BiscuitHappyz loves that new forum smell

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So there’s a 6000 character limit now? Hmm… I guess I can’t post my entire biography in one post. :/

Hopefully you all remember me. I’m that cheeky schizophrenic feller. I’m a bit late on posting on this site because my internet connection finds happiness in bothering me. XD

Anyway, if I could establish a few thing about meself:

-Rainbow Dash is best pony
-I would like to pay my respects for the old site: [Big Picture]
-I like neither pepsi nor coke, as I do not like soda
-Coffee>Tea
-Chocolate>Vanilla
-I plan on world domination

Now that is out of the way, I shall fill up the rest of this post with my very own Biography, since my profile will not let me post it. It will probably take two posts, even. I hate to double post, but I guess the new forum doesn’t have any rules against it. raspberry     (<—- I just realized, that is one odd looking emotocon.)

—-

It was a dark and stormy night in the densely forested region known as Mars. Little Biscuit, only six years old and without parents, found shelter under a large-leaved plant. Martian storms were very deadly; water tended to clump together, and could possibly cause frostbite in the cold martian climate. Wind kicked up dust that could cause blinding or choking.
  Biscuit had no desire of becoming a wet, frostbitten, blind, choking martian, but he was very hungry. The cold air gripped at his skin; the leaf sheltering him from the howling storm threatened to give way to ice and rain. His stomach growled.
  “Hush,” snapped Little BH. “Bad stomach. No growling.”
  His stomach whimpered and hushed for the time being, but remained unsatisfied.
  Sudden movement among the foliage caught Little Biscuit’s ear. His head jerked up, eyes darting around, analyzing the surrounding rainforest. It moved once more and BH thought he caught a glimpse of it in between leaves; it was food. It looked like a wild ego. Biscuit vaguely remembered hearing somewhere that egos were edible.
  Not willing to let the ego escape, he leaped out from underneath the plant, dodging the very raindrops as he raced after the ego. The rain fell slowly due to the low gravity, but little BH still had to worry about touching nearby plants, among other things, otherwise he could catch anything from a cold to hypothermia.
  He knew he was faster than the ego, but not nearly as agile. If Biscuit were to pounce on it from behind, it would simply squirm away. He managed to flank the ego, and eventually get in front of it. The trees and the sounds of water and ice smashing against the martian rainforest aided in the BH’s effort to get in front of the ego, who still thought little BH was behind it.
  In the trees, Biscuit waited. The ego was almost certainly getting worn out now, a result of the bitter cold.
  Little Biscuit caught sight of the ego below and jumped from the large martian spruce tree. Seconds later he was on top of the ego, in a freezing cold puddle.
Instantly, little BH felt the cold clench of hypothermia all around him. He began shivering, but was slowly able to scramble out of the puddle, but not in time. His vision was blurring, his heart weakly thumping in his ears. He still had the ego in his trembling arms, and little BH reckoned he had just enough time to stuff it in his mouth before he went out cold. Even this was a difficult task with hypothermia, Biscuit’s loss of coordination caused him to miss his shallowly wheezing mouth and resulted in him pounding himself in the face with an animal he found in a martian rainforest. But as black engulfed his vision, he finally managed to swallow the ego. Much to his despair, however, it was not filling at all; little Biscuit had confused ‘ego’ with ‘eggo’.
  Little Biscuit blacked out.

BH vaguely recalled later that day waking up in a dazed state, seeing two dark, blurred figures hunched over his body, talking, but not aloud, as if he were eavesdropping on a psychic conversation.
  “Did you see that?” He heard.
  “Indeed, it ate the entire thing at once.”
  “That much ego at once is not good for anyone, let alone a small child.”
  “No wonder it bloody passed out.”
  “It could hinder its growth,”
  “What should we do with it?”
  “Normally, I would say to eat it. But with such a concentration of ego…”
  “Perhaps we should take it back to the cave?”
  “But is it even alive?”
  “It has a weak pulse.”
  A moment of silence.
  “Okay, but I’m not carrying it back. It’s ego might leak onto me.”
  Little Biscuit fell back asleep shortly.

BH woke up eighteen years later, feeling as dandy as could be. This, of course, was not the only time he woke up, over eighteen years he was raised by telepathic martian wolves as one of their own. He learned how to function in a pack and how to scavenge for resources in the unforgiving martian climate. They had named him BiscuitHappyz; after the first food they fed him and how delighted he was to see it.
  “Good morning, BiscuitHappyz,” Came a telepathic message from Larry, the grey Beta who had carried him to the cave eighteen years ago. “How are you today?”
  “Awesome, as to be expected,” BH sent. “After all, I am me.”
  “I am doing fine as well, thanks for asking,” Larry jokingly retorted. “Rachael has been waiting for you. Needs to figure out what flavor hat to wear this morning. Apparently I’m not good enough for making decisions.”
  Rachael was one of the alphas, both Larry and I were betas; we helped her make decisions.
  “You’re good,” Biscuit began. “But frankly, I’m better.”
  Larry rolled his eyes. “Wash your sleeping mat later. It reeks of your ego.”
  “So it smells good, then?”
  “Get out of my flipping cave, will you?”
  BH left smirking, bound for Rachael’s.

(Continues later)

     
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(Le continuation of my last post)

Suddenly, a piercing, massive sounding shriek manifested in the sky. The ground shook as the thundering sound grew in intensity. Biscuit looked skyward to see a gigantic chunk of fiery metal hurling itself at the ground in front of him. Before he had time to run, it hit the ground. Biscuit had a chance to catch a glimpse of some sort of shock-absorbing mechanism before it bounced back into the air. The chunk of metal landed again with a thunk, and BH realized it must have been some sort of pod.
  This suspicion was confirmed when a ninja jumped out of it.
  “Martian,” It said sternly. “I come to this planet with a challenge.”
  “What sort of challenge?” It was odd to BH to hear his voice, he hadn’t talked in years.
  “A gamble. For my planet!” It said. “Or for your life.”
  A ninja planet? Biscuit wondered. “You’re on.”
  “Ha! Then your death has been sealed!” The ninja mocked. “The game shall be rock, paper, scissors! Begin now!”
  Biscuit drew scissors. The ninja drew paper.
  Biscuit could see the ninja’s own ego draining from it’s eyes. “Best two of three,” It suggested.
  “Scared?” BH taunted.
  Biscuit chose paper. The ninja got scissors.
  They were tied, the ninja regained some amount of hope. But Biscuit was determined.
  Biscuit tried rock. The ninja tried…
  Rock as well. How annoying.
  BH rolled paper. The ninja used rock.
  Despair exploded inside the ninja’s eyes. “Impossible!” It shouted. “You must have a loaded hand!”
  “Loaded,” Biscuit began. “With awesomeness.”
  The ninja drew a knife and began to run at BH. BH twirled around and dropped onto his hands, using his momentum to swing around and land a round kick to the back of the ninja’s knees. BH jumped to the other side of the now fallen ninja, took some poison ivy he found on the forest floor and rubbed it on the ninja’s back.
  “No!” It shouted, trying to scratch the spot on his back. “I cannot reach!” it set off to find a stick, leaving Biscuit with the pod.
  He climbed inside the pod through the open hatch, strapped in, closed the hatch and pressed the big, red, ‘Fly’ button. The pod shuddered and began to rise from the martian landscape. Biscuit braced himself against the G-forces that threatened to tear off his cheeks. This uncomfortable task continued for what seemed like hours; but Biscuit finally broke atmo, and the autopilot engaged. After all that hard work, BH fell asleep.

He woke up on Earth, according to the autopilot. He didn’t know what the bonkers ‘Earth’ was, to him it just looked like a building with lots of spastic screaming people in it. hadn’t they ever seen a space invader before?
  “Hey fellas,” Biscuit said. “I am BiscuitHappyz, a martian who was raised by telepathic martian wolves in a martian rainforest, and I won this planet from a high-stakes rock-paper-scissors game with a ninja. So how are things?”
  Before he could get a response to his question, he found himself in federal prison for crimes of terrorism. Luckily, one of the guards in the ‘deranged beyond all hope’ wing was sympathetic for BH’s situation and smuggled in a laptop for him. BH used this laptop to register onto a website about books where he was prompted with all sorts of stressful acronyms such as AOL IM, ICQ, and MSN IM, along with a section for writing a ‘Bio’, when it really should be “Autobio,” and this is when BiscuitHappyz decided to document his brilliant life for the world to see:
  It was a dark and stormy night in the densely forested region known as Mars…
  And so ends the glorious adventure of out egotistical martian protagonist.

\\\END TRANSMISSION///

—-

Sorry about that being so long, I got a tad carried away. XD
Anyway, I’m glad to be back.

     
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*slow clap*
BTW, best pony is RD? I thought you would have said Pinkie. Or Discord. In any case, I think I’m just surprised you made a sensible decision XD (Unlike in Mustard vs. ketchup [*forever holding a grudge*]) Anywho, brohoof /)
So, everyone here is crazy, and, if ya a member long enough, you’ll become crazy, too. If ya already crazy, then you’ll become crazzier.
I’m slightly scared about you becoming crazzier. Well, welcome back!

     
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Of course Dashy is is best pony, I’m not stupid… Pinkie is just second best pony. (\ Ketchup is best condiment tho
And I’m sure I’ll get crazier, this white backround is sorta burning craziness into the back of my retinas. XD

     
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BiscuitHappyz - 16 July 2012 02:44 AM

(1) Ketchup is best condiment tho
(2)this white backround is sorta burning craziness into the back of my retinas. XD

1. Liar.
2. Wear sunglasses constantly. Should stop the burning.

     
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littlems.fowl - 16 July 2012 02:49 AM

1. Liar.
2. Wear sunglasses constantly. Should stop the burning.

1. Eenope.
2. I don’t have any intact sunglasses in my house. :|

     
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Heh. You show up just as soon as I start wondering “what-the-heck-happened-to-BH”.
*slight twitch at the double-posted autobiography*
And would that be 18 years by the Earth circling the sun once or by some other planet?

@.@ Yeah… The only thing I dislike truly about the new forums is how bright it is. But it kind of gives it a completely-clean-whiteboard-look. Full of possiblities on what to doodle on too…
*paints all members’ nails maroon* Maroon was my elementary school’s school color. It’s getting that I’m starting to miss it… Q.Q Next year is high school.

     
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BiscuitHappyz - 16 July 2012 03:57 PM

I don’t have any intact sunglasses in my house. :|

My brain can’t comprehend that. How are you not blinded by the sun on a day-to-day basis? I really wish that character counter would stop stoping on odd numbers so that I could stop adding things in attempt of making it even. It’s starting to make me depressed….

     
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-eyes nearly bouncing out of their sockets and mouth open ready for a wild squeal to barge through, but it didnt as it was stuck in her throat- wow ( finally i managed to say it ) could you write a book for me! i liked it, no loved it. except of course the rock paper scissors game would not work in a book. could you please write something similar and publish it. ive always wanted to write but was horrible at it. could you write something? dont let your talent slip away as i let mine ( the one i had once upon a time, the one i never really felt like practicing), its your destiny!!

     
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If I remember correctly, he’s already writing one. I might be wrong (though that’s something that doesn’t happen often), but I remember something about a villain with an epic hat. He’s also written an MLP fanfic.

     
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15bubbles - 16 July 2012 05:28 PM

Heh. You show up just as soon as I start wondering “what-the-heck-happened-to-BH”.
*slight twitch at the double-posted autobiography*
And would that be 18 years by the Earth circling the sun once or by some other planet?

@.@ Yeah… The only thing I dislike truly about the new forums is how bright it is. But it kind of gives it a completely-clean-whiteboard-look. Full of possiblities on what to doodle on too…
*paints all members’ nails maroon* Maroon was my elementary school’s school color. It’s getting that I’m starting to miss it… Q.Q Next year is high school.

Martian circles; when I came to Earth I was too lazy to do the conversion, and that’s why I’ve always been twenty-four. FOREEVERRRR

littlems.fowl - 16 July 2012 05:36 PM

My brain can’t comprehend that. How are you not blinded by the sun on a day-to-day basis? I really wish that character counter would stop stoping on odd numbers so that I could stop adding things in attempt of making it even. It’s starting to make me depressed….

It’s rather simple, actually; I just never go outside.

af-fan - 16 July 2012 06:28 PM

-eyes nearly bouncing out of their sockets and mouth open ready for a wild squeal to barge through, but it didnt as it was stuck in her throat- wow ( finally i managed to say it ) could you write a book for me! i liked it, no loved it. except of course the rock paper scissors game would not work in a book. could you please write something similar and publish it. ive always wanted to write but was horrible at it. could you write something? dont let your talent slip away as i let mine ( the one i had once upon a time, the one i never really felt like practicing), its your destiny!!

1.2 ego multiplier
Thanks. XD
But yeah, as LMF said, I have a My Little Pony Fanfic that I’m currently writing; Shameless Plug
I also have two sorta discontinued Minecraft, but I think they’re inferior to the MLP one. XD
But hey guys, how’s about that picture? I added that text all by myself. <_<

littlems.fowl - 16 July 2012 06:33 PM

If I remember correctly, he’s already writing one. I might be wrong (though that’s something that doesn’t happen often), but I remember something about a villain with an epic hat. He’s also written an MLP fanfic.

I actually stopped writing that book when I realized the characters were flat and the plot was uninteresting. I’m definitely going to do something with epicly-hatted villains again if I get the chance, though. :3

     
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BiscuitHappyz - 16 July 2012 10:01 PM

(1)It’s rather simple, actually; I just never go outside.
(2)1.2 ego multiplier
(3)But hey guys, how’s about that picture? I added that text all by myself. <_<
(4)I’m definitely going to do something with epicly-hatted villains again if I get the chance, though. :3

1. But about when your computer screen gets too bright?
2. Oh great. She should have said “if you write a book then tell me the title so that I can avoid it.”
3. Yes, good job, excellent, etc.
4. Yay!

     
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littlems.fowl - 16 July 2012 10:18 PM

1. But about when your computer screen gets too bright?
2. Oh great. She should have said “if you write a book then tell me the title so that I can avoid it.”
3. Yes, good job, excellent, etc.
4. Yay!

1. I just go crazy. Or I turn down the brightness. :|
2. One does not simply ‘avoid’ brilliant literature.
3. 1.02 ego multiplier.
4. I don’t think I can find a way to give the main antagonist(s) in my MLP epic hats though. :/

     
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BiscuitHappyz - 16 July 2012 01:55 AM

So there’s a 6000 character limit now? Hmm… I guess I can’t post my entire biography in one post. :/

Hopefully you all remember me. I’m that cheeky schizophrenic feller. I’m a bit late on posting on this site because my internet connection finds happiness in bothering me. XD

Anyway, if I could establish a few thing about meself:

-Rainbow Dash is best pony
-I would like to pay my respects for the old site: [Big Picture]
-I like neither pepsi nor coke, as I do not like soda
-Coffee>Tea
-Chocolate>Vanilla
-I plan on world domination

I would have quoted the bio, but then there wouldn’t be enough characters left…

1. That bio is…. wow…..supermegafoxyawesomehot (not hot, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say)....
2. Ectopia died just before half a lakh posts!
3. Welcome back!

     
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BiscuitHappyz - 16 July 2012 10:01 PM
15bubbles - 16 July 2012 05:28 PM

Heh. You show up just as soon as I start wondering “what-the-heck-happened-to-BH”.
*slight twitch at the double-posted autobiography*
And would that be 18 years by the Earth circling the sun once or by some other planet?

@.@ Yeah… The only thing I dislike truly about the new forums is how bright it is. But it kind of gives it a completely-clean-whiteboard-look. Full of possiblities on what to doodle on too…
*paints all members’ nails maroon* Maroon was my elementary school’s school color. It’s getting that I’m starting to miss it… Q.Q Next year is high school.

Martian circles; when I came to Earth I was too lazy to do the conversion, and that’s why I’ve always been twenty-four. FOREEVERRRR

littlems.fowl - 16 July 2012 05:36 PM

My brain can’t comprehend that. How are you not blinded by the sun on a day-to-day basis? I really wish that character counter would stop stoping on odd numbers so that I could stop adding things in attempt of making it even. It’s starting to make me depressed….

It’s rather simple, actually; I just never go outside.

af-fan - 16 July 2012 06:28 PM

-eyes nearly bouncing out of their sockets and mouth open ready for a wild squeal to barge through, but it didnt as it was stuck in her throat- wow ( finally i managed to say it ) could you write a book for me! i liked it, no loved it. except of course the rock paper scissors game would not work in a book. could you please write something similar and publish it. ive always wanted to write but was horrible at it. could you write something? dont let your talent slip away as i let mine ( the one i had once upon a time, the one i never really felt like practicing), its your destiny!!

1.2 ego multiplier
Thanks. XD
But yeah, as LMF said, I have a My Little Pony Fanfic that I’m currently writing; Shameless Plug
I also have two sorta discontinued Minecraft, but I think they’re inferior to the MLP one. XD
But hey guys, how’s about that picture? I added that text all by myself. <_<

littlems.fowl - 16 July 2012 06:33 PM

If I remember correctly, he’s already writing one. I might be wrong (though that’s something that doesn’t happen often), but I remember something about a villain with an epic hat. He’s also written an MLP fanfic.

I actually stopped writing that book when I realized the characters were flat and the plot was uninteresting. I’m definitely going to do something with epicly-hatted villains again if I get the chance, though. :3


good luck biscuits! wink

     
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NO YOU CAN’T STOP THE MINECRAFT ONE I LOVED THAT D: I haven’t read it in ages because I lost the link (Again) Anyway, I read that entire story, and it was amazing, [/unintentionallyboostingego] Anywho, I’m used to the format and everything I just wish it was easier to tell who was who!! Theres no effing avvies! Blaagh! Maybe they’ll have them soon, because that would be useful ^_^